Our house goes on the market this week and so for the past month we have been spring cleaning as if our lives depended on it. It seems the more cleaning and tidying I do, the more I become ‘obsessive compulsive’ about having the house appear as ‘display home esque’ (just invented that word but you know what I mean) as possible….don’t even get me started on my kitchen pantry…since giving it a good clear out and reorganisation (I should have bought shares in Tupperware beforehand), I have found myself making special trips to the kitchen just to bask in domestic goddess pride of the very sight of it!... I think I reached an all time low point though this morning during a last minute mercy dash to clear the house of all clutter before the real estate agent’s photographer and inspecting home buyers arrived…
After exhausting all possible storage options in the house by hiding excess clothes, shoes, the iron and ironing board, photo frames, tooth brushes, shampoo bottles (and anything that may provide evidence of actual human inhabitants) under beds, in the laundry hamper, hidden behind or under folded clothes in the cupboards, I then turned to my car boot to pack away all of Amelie’s overtly bright, large and sometimes irritatingly musical toys (all mums would know what I’m talking about here – all those brightly coloured, usually Fisher Price toys, in bold green, yellow, red or orange and ghastly hot pink that you promise yourself during your pregnancy that you will never have in your house and that your child will own only quaint hand crafted wooden toys…).
Alas, you can imagine my despair when, after doing one last ‘tidy audit’ of the house before stepping out the door and all of 5 minutes before the real estate agent was due to arrive, I came across my beloved sewing machine and overlocker perched innocently (but sticking out like a sore thumb in my now minimalist home) on the desk enclave in the guest room. Ekk! Now in an absolute and slightly melodramatic panic…I thought…
“Where is somewhere that the real estate agent and inspecting home buyers would never look that is big enough to hide these machines?!”
After exhausting all possible storage options in the house by hiding excess clothes, shoes, the iron and ironing board, photo frames, tooth brushes, shampoo bottles (and anything that may provide evidence of actual human inhabitants) under beds, in the laundry hamper, hidden behind or under folded clothes in the cupboards, I then turned to my car boot to pack away all of Amelie’s overtly bright, large and sometimes irritatingly musical toys (all mums would know what I’m talking about here – all those brightly coloured, usually Fisher Price toys, in bold green, yellow, red or orange and ghastly hot pink that you promise yourself during your pregnancy that you will never have in your house and that your child will own only quaint hand crafted wooden toys…).
Alas, you can imagine my despair when, after doing one last ‘tidy audit’ of the house before stepping out the door and all of 5 minutes before the real estate agent was due to arrive, I came across my beloved sewing machine and overlocker perched innocently (but sticking out like a sore thumb in my now minimalist home) on the desk enclave in the guest room. Ekk! Now in an absolute and slightly melodramatic panic…I thought…
“Where is somewhere that the real estate agent and inspecting home buyers would never look that is big enough to hide these machines?!”
… and at that moment…because I hadn’t yet had breakfast…and had exerted far more energy than any reasonable person should during domestic related activates…my tummy grumbled…and that’s when it came to me…the FRIDGE!!!
I prayed the whole time I was at work that for the real estate agent not to offer the inspecting home buyers a glass of cold water!
Needless to say, the dramas associated with keeping a clutter free house had continued even before I arrived at work. Once I had stepped out the door and into the car, I was forced to bravely endure a continued cycle of neighing, snorting and galloping noises from Amelie’s pink Fisher Price horse (which was stabled in my car boot) all the way to work…
I prayed the whole time I was at work that for the real estate agent not to offer the inspecting home buyers a glass of cold water!
Needless to say, the dramas associated with keeping a clutter free house had continued even before I arrived at work. Once I had stepped out the door and into the car, I was forced to bravely endure a continued cycle of neighing, snorting and galloping noises from Amelie’s pink Fisher Price horse (which was stabled in my car boot) all the way to work…
Ha - that's hilarious! I can't believe you put it in the fridge. Great post.
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